Monthly Archives

August 2016

‘All the President’s Men’ … A love letter to journalism

August 27, 2016
Dustin Hoffman, Robert Redford, Jason Robards, Jack Warden .... The casting director was not messing around.

The movie: All the President’s Men

Stars: Dustin Hoffman, Robert Redford, Jason Robards, Jack Warden

Rated: PG

Released: 1976

What I “know”: A little more than most movies, but I’ll explain that below. Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein and the WaPo basically destroy a President.

What I know after reading the DVD case: (Yeah, I bought this one because Netflix had it as a “long wait” and I figured journalism + Redford makes me happy) In the Watergate Building, lights go on and four burglars are caught in the act. That night triggered revelations that drove a U.S. President from office. Washington reporters Bob Woodward (Robert Redford) and Carl Bernstein (Dustin Hoffman) grabbed the story and stayed with it through doubts, denials and discouragement. All the President’s Men is their story. Directed by Alan J. Pakula and based on the Woodward/Bernstein book, the film won four 1976 Academy Awards. It also explores a working newspaper, where the mission is to get the story — and get it right.

So, spoiler, I’ve worked in newsrooms of one type or another for essentially my entire adult life. However, by the time I got into the business, in 1999, most newsrooms were already slowly starting to creep backward from the heaving masses of humanity they once were. But I’ll tell you, if you’ve never been in one: Being on a newspaper desk, at night, nearing deadline is an intoxication and rush that’s very hard to reproduce. And it’s every day. And it’s filled with dark humor and sarcasm and people busting their butt to do what they can to get the paper out. It’s different online, as every minute is deadline so it’s both more pressure and less at the same time. But who I am is ABSOLUTELY colored by the business I chose and the people I have been blessed to know. Journalists are the best. So this is going to probably be much more a newspaper movie to me than a politics movie.

Also, good call to the main guys involved for going for “Woodward and Bernstein” over “Bob and Carl.” Bob and Carl are the guys hanging out in the Walmart parking lot complaining about their wives and Obama.

Oh, and one more thing: I’m TERRIBLE at history. It’s not my thing. I was born the year this came out, and I obviously wasn’t alive for Watergate, so I know only very surface things about it. So some of my revelations during this movie might seem stupid to any of you. Deal with it.

00:33: Want to know how to pull at my heartstrings? Start with a closeup of a typewriter hard at work.

01:15: The President’s helicopter looked like a flying VW bus.

06:50: Man, that guy who couldn’t keep his head down is the reason this all fell apart. They weren’t looking under desks or anything, just flipping on lights. Split up, hide, and keep your heads down until the lights go back off. Simple stuff, fellas.

10:30: Look, Mr. Marcum, you’ve got Robert Redford trailing you through a courthouse. Don’t act like it’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to you.

13:55: Corded phones! Legal pads and pens! Reporting in the 70’s, folks.

18:30: I warned you guys, but I’m getting all googly over the cold calls and the sketches and the doodles and the scribbles and the notepad and the information and aaaaaggggghhhhh I love reporters.

25:20: Cigarettes! Typewriters! This is amazing.

28:36: Never trust a librarian. They will lie to you as soon as they’ll help you use the Dewey Decimal System (time reference!). You would think that people who worked for the White House communications office would have better detecting skills than “she says she never talked to the guy who sits 5 feet away from you and has taken notes.”

30:14: Them, going through all those boxes of request slips? Just sitting there, doing the grunt work? THAT’S what’s missing from these days of “hot takes” and Tweets and instant gratification. The factual background for anything.

40:53: “Just … follow the money.” Always a good lesson. Oh, Deep Throat, you are a delight already.

42:43: Dustin Hoffman’s hair is a revelation.

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Dustin Hoffman’s hair isn’t here for your crap.

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Two glorious heads of hair.

47:05: So while I’ve been all-in on the tech o’ the times, I totally just was like “How hard can it be to find someone? Look them up onl…oh yeah” when they cut to Redford going through like 27 phone books. Man, you guys had it tough.

52:50: I think we’ve all had that moment where we look like Redford when he gets the connection he’s been looking for.

1:06:16: Stop me if I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m in LOVE with their reporting. Working through it, getting seconds and thirds and locking stuff down. I’m weak.

1:20:00: Rule of journalism: If you shut up, people WANT to talk. That woman had her guard up and then it just all came out. Man, she really hates Mitchell.

1:22:09: “You’re both paranoid. She’s afraid of John Mitchell, and you’re afraid of Walter Cronkite.”

1:47:05: I’d meet Robert Redford in a dark parking garage. I’m just putting that out there. Even now, at 80.

OK so I kind of bailed on blogging the end of the movie because I got totally sucked into the reporting. Sue me. As I assumed, I was much more into the journalism angle. Bless Woodward and Bernstein. I bought the book on Amazon at the same time I bought this movie, and I’m 98 percent sure I’ll start reading it tomorrow. Well, today, since it’s 3 a.m.

I miss journalism.

‘Life of Brian’ and Where We Are Now

August 21, 2016

The movie: “Life of Brian”

Stars: Eric Idle, Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Terry Jones, Michael Palin

Rated: R

Released: 1979

What I “know”: I know more about it just by looking for an image for this post. I honestly didn’t even know it was a religious parody/whatever, but there are people on crosses and stuff, so I guess that’s what’s happening? I’ve seen 98 percent of “Holy Grail” and that’s the extent of my Monty Python exposure, though I love British comedy so I’m optimistic.

What I know after reading the Netflix sleeve: “Born on the original Christmas day in the stable next door to Jesus, Brian (Graham Chapman) grows up to join an anti-Roman separatist group. But as he tries to escape trouble with the law, he finds himself reluctantly thrust into the role of the Messiah. Monty Python legends John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle and Michael Palin co-star in this classic religious satire that pokes fun at fanaticism and hypocrisy.” Hmmm a movie that makes fun of religious fanaticism and is British? I’m open to this.

02:30: Thank goodness, Monty Python asking the REAL questions: “What is myrrh anyway?”

03:57: OK the facepalm shove made me laugh out loud.

11:00: Poor Eeyore!

11:10: Man, people sure were entrepreneurial. Selling stones for the stoning, with sacks of gravel! Brilliant!

14:07: Those guards are over this shit. I laughed though. People sure do love a good stoning.

16:04: I’m going to be honest … there are going to be large swaths of this movie I just don’t understand. I watch a lot of British TV but their accents are so hard for me to decipher. The former leper, with the sing-songy and the high pitch and the speed, I didn’t get hardly any of. Thank goodness for Brian saying “Why don’t you tell him you want to be a leper again?” I think the ex-leper then said something about wanting something just during the week or something. No clue, honestly.

20:06: The whole “Call me Loretta, I want to have babies, DON’T OPPRESS ME” thing hits a little close to home nowadays. Stating facts, if it’s against someone’s desires, means you’re oppressing them. Monty Python was made up of visionaries!

25:47: OOH THERE’S A COPY EDITOR IN THIS MOVIE. Bless you, Python.

29:00: This debate about their demands is EXACTLY how I imagine the Republican National Convention coming up with their platform. “Oh, peace? SHUT UP.”

37:54: They also hit on infighting among groups with the same goal, and how it distracts from the larger purpose, as well as torture. This is gold.

40:00: I love John Cleese so much.

42:19: I wouldn’t trust anyone who DIDN’T laugh at Biggus Dickus.

43:21: Wait a second, there’s a freaking spaceship? With hands holding eyeballs coming out of the aliens’ heads? OK, this just went from satire to drug trip REAL quickly. I’m willing to suspend the point where he fell into an open-air spaceship and then went into space and had no trouble breathing, got shot down and crashed exactly where he left … because, Python.

53:46: This whole thing is frightening in its prescience. People twisting the words of someone to obfuscate the point … yeah, that never happens.

56:50: The whole thing with the sandal is also gold. This movie is perfection.

1:01:30: “I say you are [the Messiah] and I should know as I’ve followed a few.”

1:03:30: Did NOT know there was nudity. Good on you, Graham Chapman, and whoever plays the girlfriend.

1:29:57: I had no idea this was where the “Bright Side of Life” song came from. And now it’s in my head.

So, full disclosure, I didn’t love “Holy Grail” as much as most. I found it toooooo slapsticky (which I know is kind of their thing) but this movie was a good mix of weirdness with actual satire and parody. I really enjoyed this movie, no matter how jarring it was to watch it nearly 40 years after it came out and see where we are in the world. People are so desperate to look for answers and leadership from others that they bestow power to those who don’t deserve it. There is no quick fix, there is no person walking around who has all the answers. We all have to do the best we can.

‘The Way We Were’: Mismatched and stubborn

August 14, 2016

The movie: “The Way We Were”

Stars: Barbra Streisand, Robert Redford

Rated: PG

Released: 1973

What I “know”: To be honest, I didn’t even remember Redford was in this, so I’m hardly an expert. All of my knowledge comes from “Gilmore Girls,” tbh. As Lorelai and Rory told me, it has “heartache, laughter, communism, all in one neat package.” So that’s promising. I also know from Lorelai that apparently Redford is married with a kid, and that Dean (you suck, Dean) never saw it.

What I know after reading the Netflix sleeve: “Sociopolitical opposites attract in director Sydney Pollack’s wistful, Oscar-winning tearjerker about an outspoken political crusader named Katie Morosky (Barbra Streisand) who finds herself drawn to glib golden boy Hubbell Gardner (Robert Redford). Despite their differences, the improbably couple eventually ties the knot, but a move to Tinseltown and the firestorm surrounding the 1950s blacklist unravel the marriage.” First off, I’m not sure I’ll ever buy Barbra as someone named “Katie,” and I’m sure as hell not believing ANYONE is named “Hubbell.” However, I am glad to find out that this isn’t some affair story and that telescope guy (yes, I know it’s a different spelling, deal) isn’t married with a kid when they meet.

Let’s do this.

00:35: Oooh it’s the gorgeous stone bridge in Central Park. Good way to start the movie. I love that bridge.

00:50: Barbra is all kinds of jaunty in her cute dress and sensible shoes! Her hair is floating, I love it.

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01:35: And clothes aside, a big “yep, this is set in the past” moment … a dude just strolled into their sound recording puffing on a cigarette. Oh, the 1940s.

01:57: He just took off his hat and I said “holy s*** is that Stanley Zbornak?” and a quick Google search proves me right. Man, my “Golden Girls” obsession might be reaching a fever pitch (says the girl who bought this in a t-shirt and wears it proudly):

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03:05: Cute outfits AND a club done up in zebra print? Sign me up.

03:18: AND HENRY FROM “PUNKY BREWSTER?” Man, this movie is lining up my favorites.

04:19: Jesus, Redford does look good in a uniform. Or did in the 70s. Probably less so now. But yowza.

06:38: I’m 98 percent sure that “Katie” in present times would be a Tumblr feminist. I’m also not, in any way, buying Redford as a college-age kid.

11:04: NO ONE is getting that many people to a peace rally, and NO ONE is turning the hecklers that quickly. I call shenanigans!

13:00: Man, Katie is the Girl who Cried “FASCIST.”

15:30: I have never used the word “simper” to describe a man, but Redford simpers all over the place. “smile or gesture in an affectedly coquettish, coy, or ingratiating manner.” Yep.

21:35: Why does he have two beers? He’s sitting alone, on a patio, makes her take a sip from a nearly full beer, and then picks up a half-full one and joins her. Is he double-fisting it? Lord, man, slow down. And don’t wear turtleneck sweaters.

27:27: I’m still not buying them together. I’m hoping that changes. I love a good tearjerker.

32:41: Oh, Telescope, you drunken lout. Barf in her bathroom then pass out in her bed?

33:45: “Katie,” you saucy minx! At least leave the slip on and make him work for it.

36:48: I also once slept with the hottest guy I’ve ever known personally. Mine wasn’t a drunken post-barf thing though, and he didn’t pass out on top of me, so at least I had that going for me.

37:22: I wrote the first part before she spoke. Not ashamed to say the whole time the “lovin'” was happening I was like “He honestly has no idea who you are, you’re just a warm body,” but when she said “You did know it was Katie?” I did die a little inside.

38:42: This whole “morning after” scene is so awkward and makes me hate him SO much.

39:40: But good god, does he fill out a uniform.

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40:25: TFW you realize what she really means when she says, “I like snoring.”

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48:26: Goddammit, “Katie,” when you’re having a whole conversation about things that don’t come easy to him, and he has NO examples, you don’t just go to bed with the man. No matter how hot he looks in a white t-shirt.

53:41: I’m still not buying them as a couple. I don’t feel the heat that would be needed to overcome THAT level of attractiveness and social difference.

59:10: Look, Telescope (kind of) and his friends (totally) are kind of dicks. Not going to lie. But holy shitballs is “Katie” a stone-cold bitch. Lord.

1:03:45: “You really think you’re easy? Compared to what? The Hundred Years War?” OOOOOH BURN.

1:05:10: Good lord, the leaving of the key is always heartbreaking.

1:09:10: IT ALL MAKES SENSE. Now this scene means even more to me. (Warning: Gilmore Girls)

1:09:53: Sleeping pills and alcohol. I don’t like your name on you, “Katie,” but I like the way you roll.

1:12:42: 3 minutes and 30 seconds after her phone call in which she says “I won’t beg you,” “Katie” proceeds to beg her ass off. Weak.

1:13:56: WAIT JUST A COTTON PICKIN’ MINUTE. He just punched a wall, motioned like he was going to strangle her, she’s all weird and stalkery like “I’ve got you” and now they’re on a goddamn boat together? In California, I take it? HE TOOK HER WITH HIM? I think Telescope has Stockholm Syndrome.

1:15:40: Is that a car for ants?

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1:20:45: OK, when she removes the stick from her ass, I see it a little bit between them.

1:22:00: What a little blue-eyed baby they’re gonna have. I feel like this is terrible foreshadowing since I know he eventually marries someone else and Lorelai didn’t mention “for Barbra and their kid” buuuuut I’m just going to stay positive and say they had a little blue-eyed baby … for now.

1:35:50: Methinks Telescope has a little bit of an anger problem. Punching walls, throwing things … Bad look, sir. Now go put a uniform back on, the way mommy likes.

1:45:16: So wait, she had the baby? She’s not pregnant there. But it takes a while to get from writing a movie to screening one and she’s not larger. So either they glossed over her having the baby, or they glossed over her losing a baby. WTF?

1:46:09: Wait, now she’s lying in bed and she’s HUGE. After just sitting on a patio smoking and drinking and NOT looking huge.

1:47:57: There are 11 minutes left in this movie, she’s still preggers, and they’re still together. This thing must wrap up REAL fast.

1:53:28: 1. THAT’S the kind of woman he should have been with all along. Telescope don’t wanna think. Telescope wants to be pretty and be around pretty people. 2. She’s married? 3. They act like they haven’t seen each other in years … is he like not in the daughter’s life? Did he just ghost on his first family to go marry a blonde?

1:55:43: Oh good, he at least asked about her. Called her “she” like he couldn’t be bothered to say “How’s Rachel?” Dick. She tells him he “would” be so proud of her. Gah. I hate him.

1:56:27: When he took a step back, I really wanted him to get hit by a bus.

 

I have no idea how Lorelai got it wrong. He didn’t have a wife and kid to leave for Barbra, because he’d already LEFT his kid. I’m unsure at what point I switched from Team Telescope to Team Bitch … well, to be fair, I’m always Team Bitch in general. Maybe I saw myself in her, minus the curls and the political activity … pushy, loud, difficult, obstinate. As with most people, the attractiveness wore thin and his refusal to care about ANYTHING but himself overcame everything else. I hope David X. Cohen or whoever is nicer to “Katie,” and I hope he goes to all of Rachel’s recitals and stuff. Since Telescope was a total jackass.

I didn’t cry, which is weird since I honest-to-god cry every week at “What Would You Do” and I’ve cried at commercials before. But the last scene was kind of awesome, where she was finally the stronger one. He basically admitted he fucked up, and she was all “Bye Felicia, got a bomb to ban.” I do feel like a well-placed bus would have been an improvement, though. Maybe something’s lost in seeing it 43 years after it came out. All in all, I liked it but didn’t love it as much as I wanted to. I do feel like a well-placed bus would have been an improvement, though.